Inspire Confidence – What I did on my holiday break

Welcome to 2018 everyone! I hope your holidays were fun and recharging. I had hoped to report that mine were because I’d spent tons of time with friends and family, gaming and socializing, but while I did get to game some, it was sadly not all fun and games. I’m relieved to tell you all that I am as healthy as I could hope for, but I know that now because just prior to Christmas I spent 3 days in the hospital after having a massive panic attack that presented like a heart attack. 3 days away from my family, my job, my friends, my own bed, and collections of my stuff. It was stressful and terrifying.

Andrew Black and family

Just before the New Year a dear friend of Marlowe House, Andrew Black (RPG Superstar Top 16 2008), was hospitalized for a brain bleed, at the time of this writing he is doing as well as can be hoped for and we continue to keep him in our hearts with thoughts of a full recovery.

I’m telling you about this because these experiences have shown me that life is short and there isn’t time to let the unimportant things take center stage and consume my time in wasted efforts. I am making lifestyle changes to help me better deal with my stress and anxiety – I have never made it a secret that I struggle with anxiety and depression – so that I can be here for a long time, providing my children with the constant input in their lives that will lead them to needing their own therapists in the future. I’m quite proud of them, refusing to tell me the secrets of TLJ before I got to see it, building the LEGO Millennium Falcon, not murdering one another over the holiday break, best kids ever. They are the reason that I get up every morning and fight for equity of race, gender, orientation, and all that jazz. They are my priority.

I come here to write a blog every two weeks so I can help *you* reach a place of openness at your tables, so that if you ever encounter my children at your table, you treat them well and with kindness, even if you do TPK the table (which is always an option).

It’s not easy to always be inspiring, I dare say I was overwhelmed by the number of you who reached out to tell me

One of my favorite photos of Kate and Savannah

that I actually was inspiring, I figured I was just talking to myself, so thank you very much for reaching back through the internets to me. On that note, please, Please, PLEASE give your KD bloggers some love, feedback, thoughtful criticisms. We are really people with thinky brains and feely hearts that want to provide you with good content that you want to read. We want to know that we’re helping you in some small way. We’re here as volunteers, we don’t get paid to do this, we do this as a labor of love, for you (and us).  It’s easier to refill our batteries if we get a little juice back from you. So if you are reading this and you enjoy what you’re seeing from me or my fellow KD writers, please let me/us know, you would make our month.

Next time I will go back to my game design bootcamp, I have a blog ready to roll and you’ll get to see what I think about maps. Spoilers – OMG I LOVE MAPS.

Monica Marlowe

Monica Marlowe is the 2015 Paizo RPG Superstar. Winning the contest launched her freelance game designing career. Her winning adventure, "Down the Blighted Path" and PFS scenario "Captive in Crystal" are available through Paizo. She’s publishing additional gaming materials under Marlowe House and through 3rd party publishers. Monica is also active in the ongoing education in gender, sexual, and racial equality in the gaming community. Driven by a desire to see a more diverse gaming community, Monica has joined the Know Direction network to help and encourage all gamers, veteran and new, to find their voices. Monica lives in southwest Ohio with her husband, Andrew, and 2 children, Kate and Thomas.

Leave a Reply